crisis and opportunity..

A young friend of mine recently got involved with a young woman who lied to him about being over 18, and her father had him arrested for Statutory Rape. And in one moment, he was abruptly shifted from living his life, filled with hope and possibility and a future, to living in a frozen space of fear and uncertainty. Fear is like that – it can sneak up in an instant, flooding your veins with icy panic, and filling your energy field with a dark fog.

The fear is palpable around him now, and I watch him desperately trying to see his life as he knew it, through the fog that surrounds him. Pat, “spiritual” answers like “trust the Universe” and “change your vibration” are less than meaningless to him. In the midst of my fear and concern for him, can I hold that space of trust? Can I hold my vision of his future, hold the vibration of safety for him?

We talk a lot about releasing fear, transcending fear. One of my favorite speakers in my  “Profound Paths to Health, Healing and Happiness” teleseminar series was the master teacher Guy Finley. His work on fear and fearlessness is brilliant and inspiring. In our talk last fall we discussed the connection between crisis and opportunity. In some Eastern languages, the symbol for crisis is the same as opportunity.

If in each moment we stand at this moment of choice, we can say, “okay, crisis?  Opportunity?  Crisis? Opportunity?  Which shall I choose today?”  Because we so unconsciously and so frequently go “ooh, I think I’ll go for the crisis, because that’s got a lot more drama to it and a lot more pizzazz, and I know it, I’ve done it so many times, I know it!’  But we do have that opportunity in every moment to say, ‘this time I’m going to choose, I’m going to choose opportunity’ and transform the entire experience.

And if, as Guy says, fear is just the product of negative imagination, our minds creating images of what might happen, then how do we shut off the part that is producing that constant stream of frightening and negative imaginings. How do we trust in the process, not in our knowledge or our hopes or anything like that, but just trust in the process. How does my friend find the opportunity in this terrifying reality and stay present in that place of choice? How do I help him?

I have no answers. I am going to re-broadcast my talk with Guy Finley this week, and offer the conversation on fear and fearlessness, crisis and opportunity, courage and freedom. I welcome your input.

Yours in trust,


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Reverend Diane Epstein - November 10, 2010

Carol, “okay, crisis? Opportunity? Crisis? Opportunity? Which shall I choose today?” That’s a great way to see it. It is a conscious choice. Harville Hendrix says that conflict (in couples) is growth trying to happen. I feel that conflict/crisis is possibly the same for everything in our lives—opportunity/growth—and we get to choose. Plus I’m tired of drama. It gets exhausting after half a century!

Thanks for writing about this.

Rev. Diane

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